After my dad’s funeral, I went for a much needed vacation with KY (WAS STILL SINGLE THEN OK!!) to Tenggol. On the way there my head was flooded with my past, felt so heavy with the pain of watching 2 families broke – was so bad that I couldn’t get excited or happy about the trip at all.
When we reached there, the paradise-like scenery snapped me back to reality. Am I really gonna waste the dreamy trip and wallow in misery? No. Hell no, I felt a great urgency to fix my life and myself.
The basic life in Tenggol is to wake up at 7.. breakfast is ready. Need a drink? Make it. Lunch is at 12.30 and tea at 4.30. Dinner at 7.30. Biscuits is always available if hunger strikes. There are only 10 people in that island other than us. I didn’t have to worry about sleeping time or food.
Best or worst of all, this blardy hill that is in view blocks all communication. No phone line. no internet. I couldn’t work. Until–
I found out that this spot particularly, ONLY this spot has access to internet and phone line. I could tether from my iPhone to my Mac for connectivity. It was slow. I couldn’t work. And the guys went diving all the time, leaving me nothing to do but to adventure around and sort out my sorrows.
On the first day, when they went to dive. I listed down all my worries and mull over a solution that could promise me a better future. There were too many things to fix, I just broke up and gotten myself into a destructive situation. My dad passed away and for the first time ever, I left home without having to ask for permission. I was actually all alone in this world. I could die and no one would know. It was a bad state to be in.
In the end, I could only find ways to improve myself. Future not included. I figured that if I improve myself to the best optimum ever person, money-success-love-happiness would come eventually. It was the best I could do then.
Night came and I saw the most amazing thing on earth. The sky was filled with stars. It was so beautiful I could stare at it forever. The vastness of the sky and sea that blends seamlessly together dwarves my worries and I was filled with pure happiness.
To top it off, the sea had another kind of stars. Micro-organisms sparkles when I ran my hand over it. It was mesmerizing. At that moment, I fell in love with Tenggol and I knew if I were to take my diving license, it would be here.
The next few days, I spent them drinking milk tea.. skipping on stones and playing on the swings. I motivated myself to be a better person, to improve for my own future and to let go of things that does not feel right. Tenggol is a place where life is so abundant that if you remain in the same spot for longer than 3 minutes, things start happening to you. lol like sand mites. or fishes come. or iguanas. and huge lizards. squirrels. Its such a beautiful place.
Sad that they are gonna build a jetty and a resort there soon though. This may not be a proper photoshoot, with makeup and nais pose all. But this photo is one of my favorites. I can remember vividly how happy I was swinging up and down. Oh and the freedom.. damn the freedom I experienced there was amazing.. Thats all that was important to me back then.
On the last day of Tenggol, I wrote down a to-do-list (which went out of the window nao that I am what, engaged. fml). I wrapped it in a plastic bag.
and I buried it. Next time I go back to Tenggol, I’ll be happier. 🙂
Til next time then.. 🙂