There came a day when I was enjoying the Ikea ice cream with a close friend on the tall table amongst the bustling crowd of Christmas shoppers. We were cubing (rubik’s :)) and chatting away.
I grew curious of this friend’s nature of work. His product has a brand and I asked him, “Do you love [insert brand’s name]?”
To which he answered with an annoyed look and a hint of disbelief. “Yea?!! Do you even need to ask? Why, don’t you love Blushberry?” he replied.
And hence, my *thoughts* strayed to myself and skipped a few stations and landed on the Blushberry subject. Do I love Blushberry?

Skipped that and a few other airports and my *thoughts* landed back to when everything first started. A torrent of 487 days flooded my head and I started to tear unconsciously.
To me, it made perfect sense as I was experiencing the memories but to the innocent Christmas shoppers around and my poor friend, they had no clue why I was acting the way I did. Bear in mind that the journey of my *thoughts* took no more than 10 seconds.
To which I looked at him and answered with teary eyes, ” Wow. I did so much.. in just a year. I didn’t know how to answer you cuz I have always loved what I do, but the brand is just a stepping stone for me to love what I do.
I met so many people.  I did a Fashion Show. I was featured in The Star. Twice. I have emails asking me for advice on beauty. I did tailoring and photography. I got back into design. I did blog and web design. My biggest paycheck was 11k. I got a cosmetics sponsor and they are just wonderful! I did wall painting. I got my very first Nuffnang advertorial. I made friends and lost friends. I lost my partner, I broke up. I had no time for anything else but my work. I lost 8 kg of weight. I broke down many times. I had everything at one point and lost everything at another. It was so painful. I neglected my blog for a few times, yet my readers stayed with me all the way.
I just did so much. I look back and I cannot believe I did all that in one year. You know, when you are working for yourself there are no report cards or evaluations. I wonder if the other bloggers ‘report card’ themselves or not. If they do, they probably feel damn good too.”
“You cannot believe huh?” he replied.
“Yea la!!! I was so caught up in everything, ok? And besides, I plan so much that when I execute them, I already know the results so I don’t feel the success at that moment, ok? So, I guess I do love Blushberry.”

The moment when everything was at it’s peak.

{Photography by Ruby Yeo}

And so ends 2009, a year of growth for Blushberry and me. I did some good things, some bad things. I hurt others and got hurt myself in the end. Have you ever felt the extreme pleasure of having your work at its peak, your friends are the best thing in your life, your relationship is the greatest pleasure and your family are in peace and harmony?
I felt that at one point. Before I knew it, I lost all that in one day. I was all alone with no one to turn to and no where to go. There wasn’t anyone who can put me to bed and tell me that everything’s gonna be alright. (If you are sympathizing with me, stop it cuz I was the villain not the hero.)
But I didn’t give up. If I have to go through all that again, I’ll gladly do it for Blushberry but of course, I have already learnt my mistake and that isn’t gonna happen anymore.
2010 is here, I wonder what it brings.